


Uh

by agalaxyofglitter



Category: Naruto, The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, i Cannot Stress Enough How Not Serious I Am, kinda graphic but not enough for a warning, this is bad I'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-19 02:06:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17592620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agalaxyofglitter/pseuds/agalaxyofglitter
Summary: me shoving every trope in here and having legitimate fun while writing: haha this is such a funny joke. right guys? this is so funny





	Uh

**Author's Note:**

> confession time....i've never played twdg  
> and  
> i've watched two whole seasons of naruto  
> Also, I didn't thoroughly check this for errors so if something is wrong pls let me know thnxs enjoy :)

Clementine’s heart was beating so hard she could feel it through her chest. Some small part of her brain worried that they could hear it but she knew that was impossible. Closing her eyes and leaning her head back on the rock she was hiding behind, she allowed herself a moment of rest. A rustling noise sounded from the bush in front of her and her eyes snapped open.

Tentatively, Clementine called out “Who’s there?”   
She clicked the safety off of the gun she was holding as discreetly as possible. Sure the bat could hold out against walkers, but that thing in the bushes was human. And humans couldn’t beat the most powerful weapon: gun. She felt it more than saw it. A flash of orange popped out of the bush and came hurtling in her direction. Clementine swiftly took three shots at it and was surprised when it didn’t drop down injured. The force slammed into her, cracking her head on the rock behind her in the process. The person pinned her wrists down on either side of her, knocking the gun out of her hand in the process. They barely had time to get a good grip on her before she brought her leg up and kicked it into her attacker’s chest. The person fell back, heaving for breath after it had been knocked out of them. Clementine scrambled for the gun only for it to slip right out of her fingers again when the person grabbed it with inhuman speed. That was fine, she still had the bat lying on the rock. Making another move, this time for the bat, once again it was snatched from her fingertips. Clementine stopped, trying to regain her breath, taking a glance at the figure. He wasn’t moving, oddly, as he definitely had the upper hand with the bat and glock squeezed in his fists. Slowly, Clementine meets his gaze. He was dressed in an all orange jumpsuit, which looked ridiculous. His face was scratched and battle worn and his bared teeth made his blue eyes even more piercing. The shock of blonde hair on his head stood straight up, defying all laws of gravity. They stared at each other a moment and the look in his eyes softened, slightly. That’s when Clementine saw her chance, she ran full force towards him, knocking him flat on his back and was able to grab the bat and gun from his grasp. She pointed the gun right at his chest and he looked up at her in surprise. 

“Who are you?” Her voice was confident, which was surprising considering how winded she was. He wasn’t looking at her, his eyes were trained on the gun in her hand. 

She clicked the safety off and on again to get his attention, “Hey, I’m talking to you! Who are you?”   
He finally looked her in the eye again. He was breathing through his mouth and Clementine could see his sharp canines. His features were almost cat-like. Even the scars on his cheeks looked like whiskers. 

After a moment, the fight in his eyes gave out and he lolled his head back, “Naruto.” He said. 

Clementine furrowed her brows. Who? “Where are you from?” She asked, readjusting her grip on the gun. He, Naruto, dropped from his palms onto his elbows. His stance was casual, he wasn’t scared. It was worrying how nonchalant he was.

“I’m from a lot of places.” 

God, he was a smartass too. Clementine had no time for this. 

She leaned down, shoving the gun into his rib cage and spitting in his face, “Tell me what you’re doing here. I don’t have time for this. There are walkers everywhere.” Naruto licked his lips, seemingly for no other reason than to piss Clementine off. She could smell him too. He smelled like pine needles. Like he had taken a bath in pine needles. It was overwhelming enough that Clem had to lean back a little. Was he living in the trees or something? 

“I’m not from here. I’ve been sent on a mission because the walkers are beginning to invade my home too. My home was supposed to be safe. And I’m trying to keep it that way.” 

Clem sniffed, “What are you going to do, fight them off with your bare hands?” 

Naruto shrugged, his fingers tapping the hard earth “More or less, yeah.” 

“What?” 

His gaze grew harsh again, “You don’t think I can do it?” 

“No, I don’t. How is one human man doing to fight off the entirety of the zombie population?” 

He started laughing “Oh! I see. No, you don’t understand” he gestured to himself “I’m a Hokage.”

“And I’m supposed to know what the fuck that is?” By this time, Clementine has dropped the gun from his chest. He wasn’t worth the wasted bullets.

“Kind of, yeah. It means I’m one of the most powerful ninjas in existence.”

“Most powerful what.”

“I’m one of the most powerful nin-”

“I heard you the first time.” Clem said, impatiently, “So, you’re telling me.” She sighed “You’re telling me that you’re a real-life ninja? Even if that were true, that doesn’t mean you’re strong enough to save the entirety of humanity.”

“As I said, I’m a Hokage. And yes, it does.”

He was just another guy with a Messiah complex, Clem thought. And he was annoying. 

“So you’re a magical ninja, then? Like from an anime?”

“A what?”

She sighed again, “I don’t have time for this, Na-Na...What was your name again?”

“Naruto.”

“I don’t have time for this, Naruto. So why don’t you get up, leave me alone, and find someone that will take you in. Preferably someone who’s a psychologist.” She whispered the last part.

“I’ve been watching you.”

Clem turned back on him, on guard again “Excuse me?”

Naruto put his hands up, eyes on the gun again. “No, no, no! I’ve been watching you because it’s a part of my assignment. I swear it’s not creepy!” 

Clem lowered her gun a bit and he visibly relaxed. 

“I was that girl you saved from the burning barn.”

“The, wait. The girl from the barn? But, that was-”

“Yeah, yeah! That’s one of my best jiu-jitsu.”

“Your what? God, Naruto. Can you please make any fucking sense.”

“Will you put your gun down?”

“No.”

“Okay.” He put his hands in front of his chest in a strange symbol and Clem’s grip tightened. In a puff of smoke, he transformed and Clem was left struggling for words. In the place Naruto had been, there was a girl. Upon closer inspection, she had the same blue eyes and blonde hair. It was him. Clementine stared at him in amazement. He poofed back to his regular form, a huge grin lighting up his face.

“See! You believe me now, thank God.”

“...Where did you learn how to do that?”

“What do you mean?”

“The trick? Where did you learn how to do that?”

“It’s always one step forward two steps back with you, huh?” Naruto sighed “I’m getting really tired of repeating myself. I’m a ninja. From the Hidden Leaf Village. I’m trying to save my people. Along with the rest of you.”

Clementine groaned, dropping the gun to her side. Rubbing her temples, she sat down on the ground across from him. “Please explain it to me one more time.”

An hour later, the pair had finally come to an understanding. Clementine was still a bit skeptical about everything but Naruto was so convincing she decided to trust him. Just a bit.

Clementine stood up, stretching her arms above her head. She yawned, “Alright, well I have to head back.” She looked up at the sky, trying to tell the time “And you have to get out of here.”

“Yeah.” Naruto’s eyes flicked up towards her. 

“Except…” 

Clem could already tell where this was going. “You don’t have anywhere to stay?” She supplied, wearily. “Listen, you seem capable enough to be on your own. If anything, I should be asking you for protection.”

“Yeah, but” he struggled for words “...I’m so hungry.”

“You and me both.” She turned on her heel and began walking, attention focused on where she was headed.

“You have to have food though, right? Could you share some with me?”

“Sure. I could definitely share some with you. That is if I wanted to do that.”

“Oh come on, Clem!”

Clementine stopped in her tracks, Naruto bumped into her back. She hadn’t known he was following her. “What did you call me?”

“Clem?”

“Don’t. You’re not my friend.”

“It was just a joke-”

“It wasn’t funny.” She swiveled to face him, tone and face as serious as death. “We can bunk together for the night. One night. Then you can go off to do whatever journey it is you’re doing and I can go back to my family.”

Naruto’s smile almost blinded her and Clem had to turn away because her lungs suddenly seemed to not be working.

The pair walked towards an abandoned house as the sun set in front of them. Clementine stopped Naruto about twenty feet away from the house as she cautiously stepped forward to scout it out. Walking around its perimeter while banging on the sides scared out any birds inside and made sure it was zombie-free. She smiled, self-satisfied and held the door open for her new partner to walk through. Naruto made a beeline for the kitchen and threw open the cupboards, looking for anything that could have been left behind. Finding them bare, he let out a disappointed “Damn.” Clem set her bag on the abandoned breakfast table, pulling out a package of instant noodles and bottled water. Naruto hopped over the counter with surprising agility and tackled her in a hug. 

“Hell yes! I love you so much!”

Clementine shoved him off of her, “Chill! I’m not even sure the stove works.”

Naruto’s face dropped at the realization and ran back to the kitchen muttering pleas under his breath. Thankfully, the previous homeowners had been big fans of antique appliances and the stove was gas. Naruto started throwing open drawers to look for matches. After finding a pack, he took a deep breath and hoped the gas was still working. Surprisingly, it lit. He cheered and Clem walked over to pour the bottle into a pot Naruto had found in his search. Their fingers brushed as they both moved to grab the package. Clem stepped back from the stove and cleared her throat. She should probably let him do it. 

“So,” Naruto said after having put the dried noodles in the boiling water “What’s your deal?”

Clementine shrugged, tracing the grooves in the table “Nunya.”

“Ha, ha. Funny.” He leaned against the counter, legs stretching in front of him “Well, like I told you, I’m a ninja. I’m from the Hidden Leaf Village. I like saving people, I guess…”

“Have any siblings?” Clem asked, trying as much as she could to keep the conversation away from her.

“No.”

“Parents?”

“Nope.”

Clem whistled through her teeth in understanding, “I get that.”

“I have family though. People I care about.”

“Don’t we all…”

The silence stretched on for what seemed like hours, both of them lost in their own thoughts.

“Fuck!”

Clementine looked up to see Naruto cradling this hand. “What did you do?!”

“I, damn, burned my hand on the stove. Shit!” He walked over to the table, roughly sitting down in the chair.

Clem was already digging in her bag, looking for her first aid. “How did you even manage to do that?”

“My hand slipped. I don’t know! Do you have anything for it?”

“Yeah. Do you not have your own first aid?”

“...No.”

“Well, that’s just your own fault then.” She snatched his hand away and he hissed in pain. Trying to touch his skin as little as possible, she applied a balm and bandaged his palm. She could see other cuts covering his hand creating a crisscross pattern. His knuckles were battered and bruised. The calluses were split and covered in dried blood. His hands...looked like hers. She tried to break the awkward silence, “You been in a lot of fights?”

“You should see the other guys.” He sniffed, briefly meeting her eyes.

“Been fighting your whole life?” She asked softly.

“Pretty much.” He started at the palm of his hand, flexing his fingers slightly. “You?”

“Pretty much.”

The ramen was stale but, oddly, neither of them minded all too much. Soon, their eyelids started drooping and their yawns grew longer.

“Is there a bed in here?” Naruto asked through a yawn.

“Probably.” 

They walked through the house, taking time to explore the rest of it. Clem found a plastic gnome in the bathroom and took it out to show Naruto who promptly kicked it into the ceiling. His excuse was that he “hated the things”.

At the very back of the house, they finally found the one bedroom with a bed. Clementine looked at the single bed and glanced at her partner. “I can take the floor-” she began to offer but was cut off by a scoff.

“We’ll share the bed like men.” He marched towards it and collapsed face first, letting out an ungodly moan.

“I mean, you can take the floor if you want. But, this bed is softer than anything I’ve ever put my face in.”

Clem rolled her eyes and followed his lead, letting out a groan as well when the soft foam molded around her face. She turned to the side to face Naruto whose face was weirdly close to her own. “You’re right.”

Naruto stares directly into her eyes, blue eyes reading every part of her soul.

“Just don’t touch me during the night.” She added, turning over and throwing a pillow between them.  
Naruto grunted in acknowledgment and she could hear the sheets crinkle when he turned over.

As it turns out, Naruto was a clingy sleeper. During the night, he had climbed over the pillow divider and was clinging onto Clem as if his life depended on it. She had attempted to wake him up to move him several times, but he kept moving back to her. She understood, his furrowed brows revealed the nightmares plaguing him. She would’ve been fine with it, but he was so damn hot. The body heat he produced was almost unbearable. She turned over to face his snoring form.

“Hey.” She whispered into the dark.  
A snore answered her.  
That obviously wasn’t going to work. Huffing, she punched him as hard as she could in the stomach.

He awoke with a start. “Ow!” Realizing what had happened, he blew a raspberry in her face. “Now what if I had thrown up on you.” 

Clem realized their noses were barely touching, she could smell the instant chicken broth on his breath. “Just get over on your side.”

Naruto untangled his limbs from hers and stretched out. They were both short but he had a couple of inches on her. Quickly enough so she couldn’t process what was happening, Naruto poked her back in the stomach. He escaped to his side of the bed leaving Clem to stare open-mouthed at his back. 

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, Naruto.” She could see him try and hold back a laugh and went in to attack. She tickled his sides and he became a giggling mess. Clem crawled over to his side, pinning him with her legs so he couldn’t escape.

“Stop! Stop! Please, Clem!” He yelled, barely able to breathe. Clementine stopped reluctantly and threw her head back laughing. 

Suddenly, she realized their position and backed off of him, “Sorry.” Naruto was still breathing heavily. She stared at the ceiling and once his breathing turned back into snoring, she threw the pillow dividing them into the floor.

The next morning, she woke up early. She went out and scanned their house, making sure no walkers were trying to pay them a visit. When she came back inside and started gathering up their little belongings, Naruto was also up. He smiled at her slightly and went to the kitchen to put the pots back into the cupboard.

“You know you don’t need to do that?”

“Yeah, but if someone else comes by like us. It’s just proper housekeeping.”

She didn’t know why but, the word “us” startled Clem.   
“Sure. Okay.” She stuttered lamely.

They made it out of the house at around noon after meddling around for an hour or so.

“Where are you going?” Clem asked, trying to bring up the conversation of their parting as casually as she could.

Naruto turned to her “Huh? Oh, yeah. You’re dropping me off, right. Uh, that old church on the Westside is fine. I’m supposed to be meeting some people there.”

Clementine nodded her head, kicking at rocks as they walked. It was strange, but she felt like she was going to miss this kid. She started to make open her mouth to make some sentimental statement before he held out a hand in a closed fist. Her heart rate shot up and she gripped her bat. Naruto’s head whipped back and forth as he scanned the area around them, Clem strained to hear what he had heard. After a second she shook her head, “I don’t hear any-” He shushed her forcefully. That worried her. She was obviously missing something, but what? 

“Whatever it is” he turned back to look at her and she adjusted her volume “we don’t want to wait for them to come to us. We can move out and maybe avoid it altogether. Which direction did you hear it coming from?” 

Naruto’s eyes shot up to the sky as he tried to locate the direction of the sounds. “East.”

“That’s great! We can just head in the opposite direction, then.”

“No. That’s not what I’m here for.”

“You can do your whole hero thing or whatever, Naruto. I’m just trying not to die, thank you very much.” Clementine, angrily stomping off in a westward direction. The boy grumbled behind her, trying to decide if he should follow her or not. 

“Wait, Clem!”

“I told you not to call me that.”

“C’mon, you can’t be mad at me for trying to do my job!”

“No, I can be mad at you for wasting my time and trying to get me killed.”

He stopped walking “I’m sorry.”

She stopped, not facing him.

“I have something I’m meant to do here. And some girl I just met in the middle of the woods isn’t going to stop me.”

Clem turned to him, giving in a little. “Fine, I’ll help you set up camp. But, I’m not staying here so don’t expect me to help you.” She brushed past him.

“Could use your bat, but thanks.”

They walked a little ways away and set up a small camp to wait for the walkers to come to them. Clem emptied everything out of her bag and started scrubbing it with rocks. She rarely had time to wash or care for her belongings so it was a bit worse for wear. Naruto came up beside her, bending down to watch her movements.

“That’s a good idea, actually.” And the next thing Clem knew, he was stripping down naked and throwing his clothes into the stream.

“Do you have any shame?” She asked, covering her eyes with her hand.

“Nope!” She heard a splash as he presumably jumped in with his clothes. Peeking between her fingers she could see him sitting in the shallow water that only came up to his chest.

“Having a fun swim?”

“You should join me.” He splashed some water in her direction.

“Oh hell no.” Clem moved away from the water, afraid he may try something. Sensing her panic, Naruto inched toward her smirking. As Clem moved farther and farther away, he bolted up and all but tackled her. Despite her complaints about how wet he was, he dragged her back into the water. 

“Payback!” He yelled, only for his head to be dunked underwater by the girl.

“Great.” She grumbled, “Now my clothes are soaked.”

Naruto coughed the water out of his lungs and grabbed his orange jumpsuit floating in the water beside them. “May as well strip.” He said, scrubbing the garment with a rock.

“Gross.”

“I’m not trying to get you naked! It would just be easier for them to dry!”

“Sure” Clem trudged onto the rocky shore and laid down on her back “My hair is going to be a mess, too. I hate you.”

Naruto pursed his lips from the water and crawled out to lay beside her. “Sit up.”

“Why?”

“I'm gonna fix your hair.”

“Uh-uh. Just because it's the apocalypse doesn't mean I'm going to let you mess with my hair.”

“I’m just going to put it in braids. I swear!”

Clem sighed and sat up, facing away from Naruto. He took off her cap and handed it to her. He ran his fingers through her hair, which was much easier to deal with when wet. He started braiding at the nape of her neck.

“Woah.” She said, pulling away from his touch “You're going to give me an even bigger headache.”

He laughed dryly and loosened the braid. They sat quietly as Naruto worked his way around her head. Clem shivered when his fingers brushed against her neck. When he finished, he turns her around to face him. Eyeing his handiwork, he smiled.

“You look really pretty!”

If it hadn't been him talking, Clem would have blushed. “Thanks. You next.”

Naruto turned around eagerly, hunching his back so Clementine could reach his head. “I'm giving you cornrows.”

“What?” Naruto asked, craning his neck around to look at her. She smacked his head back so he was looking forward. “I said, I'm giving you cornrows.”

“I don't want-”

“Dude, I'm pretty sure they won't stay in ‘cause your hair is so thin.”

Naruto scoffed, “Well, thanks.”

Surprisingly, they did stay in. Clementine worked from the front to the back of his head. Ever so often, Naruto would complain about the tightness and she would tell him to shut up. When she was done, he ran to the edge of the stream and looked in.

“Woah! I look cool as shit!”

“Told you.” Clem joined him at the edge of the water. His reflection looked at her own, “And you look really pretty.”

“You already said that.” She couldn't bear to make eye contact with him.

“Because I mean it.”

She didn't know how to respond.

“Clementine.” He said and she had to look. The softness of her own name coming out of his mouth overwhelmed her.

He leaned to her and she found herself gravitating to him too. He tasted like the stream water and nature and something wild. Something completely him. Clementine broke their kiss and leaned back on her palms. Naruto’s eyes were half closed and he looked at her like she was his entire world.

Clem coughed, “You ought to get your clothes in case something sneaks up on us.” She stood up, looking everywhere but directly at Naruto. He stood up and went to grab the clothes floating away from them, he swiftly turned around and gave Clem another kiss. A quick peck on the lips, but it was enough for both of them. Clementine busied herself with putting her things back into her bag to hide her bright smile.  
Then they both noticed the strange silence in the air. They had been so loud, they had failed to notice the fading sounds of birds and wildlife. Clementine tensed up and grabbed the bat on the ground, scanning the bushes and underbrush surrounding them. They were here.

Not but a few moments later, distant footsteps and growling could be heard. Along with the violent sounds of flora being destroyed in the walkers’ wake. Naruto and Clementine were back to back, circling to make sure they could see all angles around them.  
It didn't take long for the first zombie to peak it's head through their clearing and it didn't take long for them to re-kill it.

There seemed to be at least ten of them as the team fought off walker after walker. It finally seemed like things were slowing down and the both of them were exhausted. Naruto had been using most of his chakra for clone jutsu, which proved to be a helpful move at the time. Clem, on the other hand, was physically exhausted from the bat swinging. She was trying to take a swing at one of them, who just couldn't seem to die. She tried to maneuver around the creature and take out its legs but it was smart. It kept swiveling so it was always looking at her. Clementine got frustrated and aimed for its head, hoping something would work. It lunged underneath the bat and towards her. She yelled out, losing control for a moment. 

“Clem!” Naruto screamed, barreling towards her.  
The walker was close enough that she could see its teeth. They were rotting and yellow, this person must’ve been extremely old. The stench coming from the thing was unbearable, she could almost taste the skin clinging to its old bones. Naruto shot between the two of them, the zombie had almost taken a huge chunk out of her. He beat the thing into the ground, standing up and kicking it for good measure. Clementine ran to him and wrapped her arms around his back. He put his hands on her and leaned into the touch. Clem turned him around to look him in the eye and check for any cuts. Finding nothing, she leaned up and kissed him, realizing he was alright.

“I’m okay.” He said reassuringly. She nodded, her fears were quelled for now.

Clem washed her bat off in the water and nodded at Naruto when she was ready to go.

The pair walked silently in the direction of the church. It was around three pm and the sun was beating down in their faces. Naruto was falling behind Clementine but she hadn’t taken notice until he started groaning in pain. She whipped around to face him and found him clutching his bandaged hand.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, running to him and rubbing comforting circles on his hunched back.

“Gah-fuck. My hand. It hurts like hell.”

“It’s just a burn. It shouldn’t be hurting that badly.” Her statement sounded more like a question. What was wrong with him?

“Yeah…”

“Naruto?” Her heart was almost beating out of her chest. If this was what she thought it was…

“It burst open during the fight. I think I might have touched something. Or someone.”

Clementine took a step back from him, “Are you saying” she swallowed “Are you saying you’re infected?”

“I don’t know yet.” He said, but he already sounded sure. He started ripping at the bandages like they were burning his palm. Both pairs of eyes stared at the skin there. It was blacker than the soil underneath them and bubbling. The skin was torn back that hadn’t been there before and the white of his bone showed through. Naruto looked up at Clem’s terrified face and immediately went into action. He grabbed the bandage and wrapped it around his wrist.  
“Need something tighter.” He mumbled and tore the sleeve of his jumpsuit off. He pulled the fabric taut with his teeth and pulled a shuriken out of his pocket. Taking a deep breath, he stabbed the knife into his palm. He cut a rough line around the infected skin, attempting to cure it off. He gritted his teeth, tears streaming down his face. Clementine stood there, shocked at his actions, she awoke out of her state when he screamed through a closed mouth. She kneeled down next to him and tried to pry the knife from his hand repeating, “It’s not going to work.”  
He tried anyway, hacking off pieces of blackened skin with blood glittering on the ground. Blood ran down his wrist, soaking into the fabric tied around there.  
He finally stopped, hand going limp but the shuriken was still stuck in his hand. Clementine pulled it out, blood, his blood, dripped onto the ground.

“I can’t take you to the church. Not with the other people around.”

Naruto nodded, he understood.

It hadn’t hit Clementine yet, she just cradled him on the ground and tried as best she could to comfort him. It didn’t take long for the skin on his forearm to start bubbling and rotting and that’s when Naruto started telling her to leave.

“You have to go. You have to get away from me, Clem.”

“It’ll be awhile before it gets really bad.” She mumbled, mostly to herself.

“No, no. You’re not going to do that. You’re not going to stay here and get hurt. You have family remember?”

Clementine shook her head, “Yeah, but-“

Naruto shoved her away from him with his uninflected arm. His voice was harsh but his eyes didn’t meet hers, “Get out of here.”

“Naruto.” Clementine could see his dull eyes that didn’t contain their usual light.

“Please.” His voice broke and stray tears ran down his dirt soaked face. “It hurts enough already.”

Clementine nodded, hesitating before pulling him into a hug. His breath tickled her ear, “Thank you, Clem. For everything.”

A sob escaped her mouth. He didn’t deserve this. Even after a couple of days, she knew he didn’t deserve this. They had connected on a level she wasn’t able to with most parents. If only they had gotten more time, if only he had gotten more time.

Clementine held back her tears, trying as hard as she could to be strong. She turned away from Naruto’s shriveled form and planted a firm foot away from him.  
She had to move on, she had to fight and live. She had to do it for him.

Each step away from him was easier to take.

Clementine was going home.

**Author's Note:**

> take a shot everytime clem sighed


End file.
